The Primpoles next door at number 6 have a toadstool on wheels. It is a small one - roomed affair,and not built yesterday,but is still the source for them of several holiday breaks per year.They do not generally say more then hello or cheerio to either Pendragon or myself, so we never know their destination when they set off into the blue beyond. On Saturday morning, bright and early,the toadstool on wheels had its door flung open and Severity Primpole, wash pail in hand, descended upon it,and clambered inside. Everything,from rag ribbon rugs to faded bedding cushions, was flung outside on the cement pathway next to our four wheeled carriage holder.The wheeled toadstool seemed to sink a little lower with the weight of Severity inside, and soon the sound of her bustling about,making the dull brown interior sparkle and shine, was significantly louder than the dawn chorus.Half an hour later,Weedy emerged from the Primpole cottage with bags and boxes of necessities for a new trip to celebrate the May Day Dew Holiday.He had not balanced everything as he should,and before long he was leaving a trail of tea bags, and soap suds, paper towels and broken biscuits from his garden gate to the door of their getaway toadstool.A few curses under his breath later,Severity was standing watching him stagger and stumble from the doorway,hands on hips and face like thunder.
"You had better pick all that up,before you do anything else." she snapped. But when he did bend over to pick up what he could, it only served to imbalance him further,and more items tumbled to the ground. Severity's screech level was now reached . "Watch what you're doing. Give me that. Look at the mess.How could you ? You are dropping everything. Stop that. I said watch what you are doing. Get in here now. Don't pick those up.They are ruined. I'm not eating those. Oh, get out of my sight. "
Weedy was stunned by this barage into standing completely still and not replying to any of the abuse. I fear he had trodden through this path of unworthiness before. She advanced towards the debris, and gathering all of it up in her sinewy stubby fingers, swept Weedy and herself into their mobile home,from which the sounds of further beratement continued.
I heard all this from the relative safety of our front garden at Flowerpot Cottage. Severity is someone who has always struck me as having a relatively short fuse in times of trouble.Weedy,having signed up with her for the long betrothal haul,clearly knows this and presumably has learned to deal with these outbursts. However when he passed back into number three(to collect replacement chocolate chip munchies,I would imagine) I distinctly overheard him mutter under his breath," I"ll get them when I"m ready !". At the door he turned and pointing emphatically in Severity's direction,(although she was too distant to have seen him do so) said with pique in every syllable - " So there. Put that in your elfen pipe and puff it."
He banged the door behind him.I smothered a small escaping giggle and pretending not to have noticed, continued pruning the honeysuckle by the door. They must have smoked the pipe of peace later, for by two in the afternoon,I saw them hitching the mobile toadstool to their four wheeled motor carriage,lead out the wildebeests and put them on their back seat, and eventually head off for a vacation somewhere green and woody. The cul -de -sac always seems quieter when they have gone. No dogs bark relentlessly day or night, and you forget to fear the red in their eyes as you pass the iron gate. Maybe they will take a longer break on this occasion,and our shattered nerves will enjoy a well earned celebration.
Pendragon and I really enjoyed our theatrical outing in the Metropolis last night. The comical drama we saw was beautifully written,and very funny indeed. Curdken Finnbar and Sensonita Rush had superb comedic timing,and the rest of the cast were able additions to the teamwork on stage.We walked home to Pendragon's city toadstool,with a light in our eyes and fun in our hearts. We do so love our metropolis weekends and I know that Pendragon has many more such outings planned.We love the theatres,we love the eateries, we love the cityscapes and trendy filmhouses. Tomorrow I go to meet Portamus Cumberpatch,the editor of the Dingley Dell Daily Scandal,to discuss my new column as "agony elf." I am to write for the local broadsheet twice every week, answering local readers' problems,and commenting on life's dilemmas along the way. I am anticipating this new role with much joy,and not allowing the reputation of the worthy Cumberpatch as a bit of an unforgiving tyrant ,to put me off. I shall dress in my finest executive vestments,and smile all the while,no matter his forbidding exterior. Pendragon has advised that I make no attempt to try to alter the fine person that I am, as Cumberpatch merely wants a nosey parker of the highest order. I am a mite uncertain as to why he would feel that I would fit the bill, but will trust that my true rainbow colours will cast a comforting glow throughout tomorrow's proceedings.
Much striving and successful endeavour in the new week to you all my friends, from Amarantha Willow, the dear Rainbow Faery